A Poem

Never once did I need time to think,
Or doubt our love with false instinct,
I held on by a thread of string,
Unable to fly with broken wings,
To every word you ever said,
The thoughts came rushing to my head,
I try to trust in you again,
But still my heart breaks with no end.

I fear that you will never know,
How much love for you I hold,
No matter what you put me through,
I promise to stay true to you.

But may I ask?
Why her? why now?
My heart still bleeds,
My head still pounds,
Was it me? I'll never know,
Maybe these thoughts just need to go,

But still I wonder.. what was said?
When I was gone, and you in bed?
Did you tell her that you liked her, too?
Or miss her, while I thought of you?
Did you ever think of me the days,
Where I was gone, and went away?

Did you shed a tear while I cried my eyes,
Every single day and night?
I hoped and prayed you'd come around,
And pull me up before I drowned,
But you left me there, alone and scared,
You wandered off without a care.

Maybe you will never know,
How it feels to be alone,
Laying at your side at night,
Hoping you would see the light,
Wishing you could just see me,
And everything we used to be.

Instead you just pushed me away,
even til this very day,
Will we ever be the same?
Will you ever take the blame?
And now you say you want me back,
My heart and head dont work like that.

Tell me now,
I need to know,
Should I stay?
Should I go?
Is it only me you see?
Is it my company you'll keep?
Do you ever think of her,
Tell me now if you're unsure..
And all this time I've fought for you,
Thinking you'd fight for me, too

Tell me now, is it real?
Everything you say you feel?
Was it true before all this?
When everything seemed to be bliss?
I would have married you, you know..
You were my very heart and soul,
You told me that you saw no end,
But now my heart needs time to mend,
You say you love me,
And that you care,
Reminding of memories we've shared,

Sometimes what we want in life,
Maybe isnt what is right.
Even though I love you so,
Stephen, I just have to know..
Tell me you apologize,
And wipe the teardrops from my eyes,
Hold me close and let me know,
That you'll never let me go.
Tell me I am meant for you,
Tell me everything is true.

Memories like bleeding ink,
I need time to stop and think,
Cuz when we talked you seemed unsure,
Whether it was me or her.
If its me then let me know,
Hopefully our love will grow.
Ill forgive and I'll forget,
Act like we did when we first met.
And if we part,
Then you'll see,
Everything you had in me.

It shouldnt have to be so gray,
I hope that you can find your way,
Always know im here for you,
Everthing I said was true,
I loved the way you made me feel,
This is why it's so surreal,
You were supposed to be the one,
You promised you would never run,
You promised that you'd always fight,
Promised to stay by my side.
Remember how you looked at me?
Loving unconditionally.
And as these burning pictures fade,
I hope there will be more to make.

And When all is done,
We've said goodnight,
You'll toss and turn,
Can't sleep tonight,
You'll come to see what I've always known
And understand that we belong.